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NEW SHORTS #1 FUNNY SHIT
Fri 10 Jan 21:00 ICA, Cinema 1
This popular kick off to LSFF returns to put a smile on your face for the New Year. Drown the January blues with a few belly laughs, both dark and more lighthearted. Watch out for new film work from performers Kim Noble and Ursula Martinez.
ARE YOU ALBERT?
Dan Hodgson 6 mins
Gary and Claire a young couple whose relationship is in its death throes. On their way to a wedding reception they stop in to visit Claire's elderly grandma, who suffers with dementia. An incident during the visit is the final nail in the coffin of their relationship.
CRAZY FOR YOU
James Moran 10 mins
It's difficult to find love when you're a serial killer - when Charlie meets the girl of his dreams, he has to keep that slight flaw a secret from her. Will true love win the day? Or will she become another of his unwitting victims? Crazy For You is a romantic-comedy-horror for everyone who has skeletons in their closet - metaphorical or otherwise...
DEATH OF A PET
Clare Macdonald 8 mins
A couple try to protect their young son with unintentionally disastrous consequences...
Will Herbert 11 mins
Kevin and Emma are starring in a new kitchen sink drama together and it's the first day of rehearsals. Even with a tyrannical reputation preceding ‘The Director’ they still have no idea what they are in for. As they follow his method they descend into the surreal world of mistaken identity and dark bizarre comedy.
DON'T FEAR DEATH
Louis Hudson 3 mins
A fast-paced comedy about arguing the benefits of being dead, aided by a montage of corpses and a dance-crazed Grim Reaper. Today is the first day of the end of your life.
ELEVATOR PITCH, THE
Simon Ryninks 2 mins
'90% of all Hollywood careers begin with an elevator pitch' - Jerry Bruckheimer
Robert Ford 11 mins
Alec gets fired from his job, but rather than tell his wife he lies - he tells her that he's in line for a promotion. Will he pluck up the courage and come clean? A short comedy starring John Hollingworth (the Dark Knight Rises) and Helen Bradbury (Quartet).
HAVE YOU SEEN NAPOLEON?
Rémy Bazerque 15 mins
Sebastian is an eccentric piano teacher with a penchant for Beethoven and impossible love affairs. Secretly infatuated with his student’s sister, Roxanne, he resolves to declare his love for her as he heads to their house for his weekly lesson. But his plans are threatened by the arrival of the one thing Sebastian fears most, his most sinister nightmares incarnate: a nauseatingly cute kitten.
HOW TO GET MUGGED
Cecilia Fage 3 mins
Two hipster girls have attained their dream of living a gritty urban lifestyle in London's East End, but they still haven't had the ultimate Hackney experience - being mugged. When at last their wish is granted, and they finally meet their own personal mugger, they make sure they get exactly what they want from him.
MICKEY & MICHAELA BURY THEIR DAD
Tom George 8 mins
Deep amid the English countryside a brother and sister prepare to bury their recently deceased father in the woods. All Michaela wants to do is give her dad a decent send off. She isn't about to let her brother, Mickey, or the mysterious circumstances of their dad's death, spoil the day
Benjamin Bee 1 mins
Sometimes it's hard to find your place in the world... Especially when you're orange...
Kim Noble 4 mins
A dead pigeon lies in the street. What does this mean? As a race we can't just ignore this, can we? A short film documenting the real disappointing journey of a dead pigeon whilst contemplating how we should all 'go' when our time comes.
Chloe Thomas 11 mins
“Have you ever thought about becoming a closing down shop?” ShopGirl Blog is a comedy for hard times. ShopGirl is an unsuccessful writer, with a day job. A 6-day-a-week day job. She works in her mum's struggling Bermondsey lighting shop, and blogs about their strange customers. Today is their best day ever – the first day of their closing down sale.
John Hardwick 2 mins
3 strippers at a table dancing club are drinking and chatting backstage. One of the strippers hears her track and knows this is her cue. As she exits, she puts her glass of wine down on a table. The table starts to move. The camera zooms in on the table ……. dancing!
Ben Mallaby 2 mins
In the year 2015 time travel has been invented, and like all new technologies it is abused by everyone
Andrew Griffin 3 mins
So if you could have any one thing, just the one wish fulfilled - anything at all - what would you chose? What would you wish for? The animated hopes and wishes of a motley few.